Guess he decided that he only had time for “Half-a-tan”. He get’s 5 FV tickets, and an all expense paid trip to Hollywood tan to finish tanning the bottom half of his body.
**Pic courtesy of Nowaygirl.com
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So there it was on a lovely Thursday afternoon, the day which I was scheduled to meet with the therapist. A day that I thought was going to be all about me, where I could kick back, relax, and just plain ole get some things off of my chest…Boy was I WRONG!!! Once I arrived at her office, Michelle (the office assistant), greets me, and let me know that the Doctor was ready & awaiting me. As I proceed into Dr. Labamba’s office, I notice that she is not sitting in the “Big Black Chair” at her desk, but is stretched out what seemed to be comfortably on the chaise lounge (the patient’s couch) with her eyes CLOSED. She instructed me to have a seat at her desk, and grab a pen and note pad. I was a little skeptical as to what was going on, but hey I did as I was told figuring that this was some form of new therapy or something-lol. I took at seat at her desk not knowing what to expect, but waited for her command. The next thing that came out her mouth left me in total dismay! “It all began in England circa 1948, when my Mom worked as a dancer at Madame Ruby’s Burlesque House.” She then went on to talk about everything from how her parents met, their abusive marriage, her strange childhood & adulthood, to everything else in between. I didn’t know what to do, neither what to say. I was put in one heck of a position where the patient had become the therapist. Every time I tried to get up to pardon myself, she would start crying and ask me to please have a seat. I had began to wonder if this was some sort of game show & if I were being “Punked” by Ashton Kutcher. I glanced around the office looking for what could be a hidden camera, or waiting for someone to jump out to confirm it was only a joke. Again, was I wrong for thinking!!! Wait, it gets better. After she finished with her therapy session, she thanks me for allowing her to get a load off of her chest and tells me that she’ll bill my insurance & catch up with me in the following weeks! WTF?!?…was my response. You’ve got to be kidding me! Right? Wrong. Where do they do this at? Apparently the physicians staffed at 1515 Couqui (pronounced Koo-Ky) Ln. My only thought to do was what my favorite Tv Grandma MADEA would do… Say a few choice words to her, snatch a couple of fru-fru paintings off the wall, and flip the couch over before leaving, but I didn’t. I simply told her it won’t be necessary to contact me, and that she’d be receiving an invoice for my services in the mail. Later, I was so intrigued by her previous behavior, and the inner workings of a human brain, that I studied Psychology & took it up as a profession. Needless to say, she’s one of my best clients lol.